Full Circle


Full~

Harmony in rising sun

Awake to light of day

Dreams reflecting and fading

Character witnesses nature

Open eyes wide and smile

Road winding endlessly

Awaiting dreams distant

Circle~

Distant dreams awaiting

Endlessly winding road

Smile and wide eyes open

Nature witnesses character

Fading and reflecting dreams

Day of light to awake

Sun rising in harmony

Zombie


“Zombies do not speak, cannot fend for themselves, do not even know their names.” ~Wade Davis, The Serpent and the Rainbow

Sometimes I feel like a zombie, staggering through life, head full of dreams and starving.  I open my eyes and stretch as the sun goes down. The night drags on, so I fill it with words, until I look up to find daylight leaking through my window.  I tell myself each morning as I close my eyes that I will end the vicious cycle.  I set my alarm for three in the afternoon and hit snooze until it stops going off.  Two hours later I wake to see the sun sinking below the horizon once again.

People retire early where I live.  Restaurants are closed by ten, and most everything else closes by six or seven. On my schedule, the only place to shop is the twenty-four hour Walmart, and I hate shopping there.  Hardly a market exists that Walmart hasn’t stuck it’s hands in, and the good ol’ mom and pop shops are suffering for it.  I prefer to support my local community, whatever community that may be at the time.  Yet, how can I if the town is asleep when I wake?

I don’t know any other zombies who share this bizarre sleep pattern besides Brad, my fiancé.  It’s hard to make friends in this world.  I used to go out to bars a lot, and it was easy to meet people that way.  I even met Brad at a bar (a gay bar, in fact, but that’s another story). I stopped drinking two years ago, so ironically, we choose to avoid the nightlife.  I don’t know where to go to make friends now.  I feel like an outsider wherever I go. When you spend your life moving from place to place, you learn not to let yourself become comfortable with your surroundings, and it starts to take a toll.  I’m beginning to notice the long-term effects.

Tomorrow I want put an end to this vicious cycle.  I will set my alarm early and get up when I hear its shrill call.  I’ll go to sleep before the sun starts to come up, set the alarm for an hour earlier than I set it the day before, and repeat this pattern until a new cycle forms. It’s time to step out of the darkness and into the light. The sun is beckoning.